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Stepping Into a New Chapter: How My Son Found His Confidence

Stepping Into a New Chapter: How My Son Found His Confidence

Firstly, thank you for reading this.. This weekend was a huge triumph moment..

What a weekend!!

I must say, when things aren’t planned, and you just go with the flow alongside the right people, magic happens.

Let me tell you how this unfolded...

Saturday was a big one for us. Bentley, my youngest, had his Oztag National Cup tryouts. These weren’t just any tryouts – this was for the State Representative side!

Now, let me share a bit about Bentley. He’s my fourth child, and by the time you’ve had four, you really know what you’re doing. But here’s the thing – Bentley was always different. From the moment he was born, I could feel it.

Unlike his siblings, who were pretty happy to be passed around, Bentley only ever wanted me. No one else would do. Not for feeding, not for comfort – just me, especially in those first few months. We were, and still are, so connected.

This time around, parenting was different. I got to do it my way.

With my older three, their dad and I had split when they were still young. We had very different parenting styles, and sharing time 50/50 made things even trickier. But with Bentley, he was all mine. This time, I had the space and freedom to be the kind of parent I always wanted to be – all in, all love, all me.

And it shows.

Bentley has always been naturally talented when it comes to sports. From a young age, he was kicking a soccer ball around like a pro – at just two years old, he was better than most six-year-olds! By the time he was six, he was unstoppable.

He joined an amazing soccer team that stuck together for two years, and they were a force to be reckoned with! Even when they were outnumbered on the field, they won. The team had heart, and Bentley shone.

But things changed. His team broke up, and he had to start fresh with a new group. He wasn’t loving it the same way. Then, we watched his older brother Angus play his first rugby league game, and Bentley was hooked. He’s been obsessed with Nathan Cleary since he was four. I’ve probably bought every magazine with Cleary on the cover since then!

Naturally, Bentley started playing rugby too. One season of Rugby and then Oztag, and he was determined to make the rep side when we found out tryouts were on.

This past year, Bentley has been everywhere – soccer, rugby, jiu-jitsu, Oztag, surfing. And then, came the Oztag National Cup tryouts.

I was excited for him, but nervous too. Bentley’s not a morning person, and once he’s in a certain mindset, it’s hard to switch him out of it. He’s also very critical of himself and struggles with confidence. Despite his outgoing personality, he just didn’t believe in his abilities.

It’s crazy, right? Here’s this kid who surfed since he could walk, loves adventure, and yet, he doesn’t see himself as brave.

I realized something needed to change.

How could I teach him to be confident if I wasn’t feeling confident myself? So, we took on this journey together. I researched, read, and worked on confidence-building strategies for both of us.

The Oztag tryouts were like a test – not just for Bentley, but for everything we had been working on together over the past 6 months!

The first half of the first game was tough. He wasn’t switched on, walking, missing tags, clearly frustrated. I had to walk away at one point, sit under a tree, and take a breath. Sometimes, as a parent, you just have to let go for a moment and trust he’ll figure it out.

Then something changed.

He started to switch on. With every good move he made, I cheered my heart out. I became his biggest cheerleader, and little by little, I could see his confidence starting to build.

Two moments stood out.

First, he made a grubber kick, and the opposition dropped the ball. We got it back, and his team scored, all thanks to his play. Then, while defending, Bentley was eyeing an intercept. The other team fumbled the ball, and Bentley sprinted to scoop it up. He ran the length of the field, with two players on his tail, but he made it!

By the end of the tryouts, Bentley was doubting himself, as he often does. He wasn’t sure he’d done enough to make the team.

But I knew.

And this time, I didn’t let him spiral into self-doubt. I made him speak something positive instead.

The next day, we went fishing. It was a long, quiet afternoon with lots of bites but no luck. But then, as if the universe knew we needed a win, Bentley caught his very first fish. It was his moment of pure joy!

Check out my personal Instagram to see the video of this moment.

The next morning, the rep team lists were released. I was shaking as I clicked to check. The anticipation was intense – what if I’d been wrong all along?

But then I saw it – his name was right there, first on the list. He had made the team!

I ran to him, shouting, “You did it! You’re in the team!” The joy on his face was priceless, a mix of shock and pride.

It didn’t end there, though. That same afternoon, Bentley earned another stripe on his Jiu-jitsu belt. It felt like the universe was aligning everything for him.

This journey has been incredible for both of us.

Bentley is now unstoppable, and watching his confidence grow feels like watching everything fall into place. He even said to me, "I’m so good!"

That’s the moment I’d been waiting for..

– when he truly started to believe in himself.

We’ve been on this journey together, learning confidence, embracing challenges, and celebrating every win. And it’s not just about the big moments – it’s about all the little ones along the way.

And the best part? We’re only getting started.

I hope that in some way you find this story inspirational or motivating. Just because something may seem a certain way right now, doesn’t mean it has to stay like that. Things can change, and sometimes it’s those small steps that lead to the biggest shifts.

If you ever need a reminder of that, or just want to chat, message me anytime.

I’m here x

- Ness Gentle